Giving away that progress at $4 a splash

Howdy commuters!  Hmm, or should I say “Howdy Fellow Exxon, BP, Chevron Supporters!”

Long time, no vent.

No, we haven’t moved Seatac or Redmond.  We didn’t suddenly take up bicycling or start a local chotchke store.  We are still making the escape-from-egypt-south-for-the-winter trek from nowhere to somewhere to keep the IRS and Olympia happy.

When do we get the thank you letters from the children of the oil company executives and speculators?  Summer is coming and they must be planning the mother of all vacations!  They must be renting Liechtenstein for a few months.  Now it all makes sense.  Good times, good times.

So let’s go over some of the explanations for why we have been led to the barn and hooked to the milking machine.

• Unrest in the middle east.  Hmm, is this new?  Isn’t there always unrest in the middle east?
• Oil speculators.  Fascinating.  I’m not a fan of government getting involved in any business transaction, but this is sounding like a lightly veiled licence to steal to me.
• Lack of refineries.  Ok, I understand this one a little I guess.  I get just as nausiated as the next guy when I see wildlife floundering in spilled oil.  I agree we need to break our dependence on oil.  That being said, until we can all drive cars powered by warm thoughts, we have to find a way to make sure we don’t break our banks in the mean time.  If only we could fuel a car with foul language!
• Increased world demand.  China, blast you for making all that progress!  How inconsiderate!  I get why this makes the price rise, but I don’t understand how this translates into bull dog collar like spikes.

I don’t know about you, but my teets hurt.  Here’s what I think is actually happening.  There is a group of people in and around the oil/gas industry who watch Google news.  When they see an article like “Civil War eminent in Libya” they take 40 seconds to do the happy dance then make a few phone calls to cash in on the fear. 

Do I think $1 per gallon is still feasible in 2011, no.  Giving a few cackling profit junkies the ability to squeeze the world every time they need a fix has got to stop!

Don’t drive angry, drive weird!